If we’ve spent time together, you’d be able to tell that I thoroughly enjoy being Monica, but have you ever wondered why? You might think it’d be rude to ask (and you’d be right. Don’t ask me or any escort that question) but I think it’s a valid question nonetheless. After all, what I do is an unusual profession, not at all accepted by society and how did a young woman who seems to have everything going on for her end up doing this?
It’s not that I don’t care about what other people think of me or how they would treat me if they knew. I do, and that’s why I hide my identity. I have a family of academics who would be severely disappointed and a career at an organisation renowned in its industry that probably won’t take my choice of a side hustle very well. Unfortunately, it’s a valid career choice involving two consenting adults that still enrages most people that have no business in it, funny isn’t it?
So why did I make this choice of making Monica such a big part of my life? I’ve thought about addressing this in a blog or a series of Twitter posts and reconsidered it many times as I would be opening up about something very personal to me. But I have been here for a while and Monica has been a major part of my happiness and personal growth for the past five years. She has brought amazing people and opportunities into my life and I feel it’s the right time for me to open up.
The narrative we often hear is that women entered into sex work out of poverty and desperation. While that is unfortunately true for many women and doesn’t mean that they are not willing to work hard or get educated (many are hard-working students, mums etc. who have been let down by our economy and support systems), my story is a little different.
Growing up I was a shy and reserved type (that’s what people said about me that I never quite agree with). I always knew I was massively sexual and lucky for me, I was able to enjoy that side of me in my early twenties while in a secure relationship with a loving and open-minded partner. I had a lot of fantasies and many have been realised over the years. Some are alright – better fantasy than reality, others are just meh, while a few are awesome – such as becoming a "high-class" escort like Belle De Jour. I had read the book and ever since I’d dreamt of turning up in my little black dress, high heels and an exquisite set of lingerie underneath, in front of a hotel room where an older, wealthy man I have never met in my life opening the door for me. Then he makes love to me and pays me an average person's weekly wage for simply being sexual with him for a few hours.
My first time as Monica was exhilarating and easy. I knew it wasn’t going to be a once-in-a-lifetime experience for me. I knew I wanted more of it. Fast forward years later, all the superficial things that I had dreamt of didn’t seem to be as important to me as they first did. I had swapped cocktail dress for jeans and runners, shorts and thongs and even a set of Pjs. And the wealthy gentlemen that I had dreamt of? Sometimes they are younger, sometimes they are just very similar to me, a regular person with a desire for a more simple life. Wealth and success can be defined in so many different ways, that’s one of the things Monica has taught me. "High-class" is no longer the word that resonates with me or the experience my clients and I enjoy together. And who knew that beyond these material things that I had thought were behind how everything worked, there was laughter, genuine (AMAZING) passion, vulnerability, compassion, friendship and so much more. These emotions combined to make up something that feels a lot like love (I’m not kidding). I always feel like my client and I are lovers stuck in a vacuum, where time and place and other real-life matters, don’t matter. I’ll let you in on my little secret: I always fall in love a tiny bit in a booking. Give me a day or two and I’ll get over you.
But it can’t be real if money is involved? Ha! If that’s what you think, we’ve never met then. Although it was never just about the money or survival for me, I wouldn’t do it without the money either. I love that my clients contribute to my well-being and would not have it any other way. I encourage you to take the plunge, pick up the phone and send me the damn text. You found me online somewhere (Twitter maybe?). You followed my prompts and here you are reading the end of this blog, I must be on your mind more often than not, aren’t I?
With anticipation, I'll be waiting for your message. Let's start the journey and make some beautiful memories together, shall we?